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Two Cannibals Two cannibals, a father and son, were elected by the tribe to go out and get something to eat. They walked deep into the jungle and waited by a path. Before long, along came this little old man. The son said, "Ooh dad, there's one." "No," said the father. "There's not enough meat on that one to even feed the dogs. We'll just wait." Well, a little while later, along came this really fat man. The son said, "Hey dad, he's plenty big enough." "No," the father said. "We'd all die of a heart attack from the fat in that one. We'll just wait." About an hour later, here comes this absolutely gorgeous woman. The son said, "Now there's nothing wrong with that one dad. Let's eat her." "No," said the father. "We'll not eat her either." "Why not?" asked the son. "Because, we're going to take her back alive and eat your mother." |
Nasreddin Hodja One day, when Temur was going hunting he wanted the Hodja to join him. In front of the palace, where the hunting started, they gave him an old, tired horse. During the hunting suddenly it began to rain. Everybody put their horses to the gallop and ran away. But the Hodja couldn't... As the weather was hot he took off his clothes and put them under him. And so he returned slowly to the palace. When the rain was over he put on his clothes again. When he arrived at the palace, his clothes were dry and Temur was most astonished. “We all got wet”, he said. “How is it, that you are still dry?” “Oh, Sir”, the Hodja replied. “With the help of this horse, I arrived at the palace without getting wet.” Another hunting trip Temur wanted the horse which was given to the Hodja before. By a great coincidence it again began to rain and Temur got wet. When he came back to the palace he angrily called the Hodja and asked what it meant. “Oh Sir,”, the Hodja said. “I am very sorry. I forgot to tell you, that you also had to put your clothes under you and then you would not get wet.” |
After the Hodja got the recipe for liver from his friend, he bought again some liver and because he liked it very much, he wanted to eat it often. But everytime when he brought livers he couldn't eat it, because his wife said that the cat took the liver and fled away. One day the Hodja became angry and said: “Woman, I brought liver! Where is it?” “Oh”, said his wife. “The silly cat took it and fled away.” At the same time the cat was in the room. The Hodja caught it, brought a steelyard and weighted the cat. Then he said: “That is exactly two kilos. And the liver which I brought was also two kilos. Now tell me: If that is the liver where is my cat, if that is the cat, then I want my liver |